There comes a time in life where you may find yourself questioning it all. How did I get here? Why do I feel the way that I do? Will this ever end? Is this what life is? There came a point in my life where everything began to change uncontrollably. I used to call that part of my life ‘everything falling apart’. I now see it as ‘everything coming together’. And that doesn’t mean I now live a life free from worry! Not at all, I too still face many challenges. What I learned was that change and, what felt like falling apart, wasn’t the end it was the beginning. It was the space where old identities, beliefs, and attachments crumbled, making room for something deeper and more authentic to emerge. I realised that life wasn’t asking me to have it all figured out; it was asking me to surrender, to trust the process, and to reconnect with the parts of myself I had long ignored. It taught me that even in the messiness, there’s wisdom. And while I still face challenges, I now meet them with a sense of compassion and an understanding that every unraveling holds the potential for profound growth and deeper connection to my mind, body, and soul.
But before I came to that understanding, I really did have to watch it all fall apart. But at some point along the way I realised I had embarked on a beautiful journey of transformation.
After ending a ten year relationship three months before the wedding date, I realised not only was I grieving my relationship but I was unveiling years of stored and suppressed emotions and breaking free from deeply-rooted beliefs and familial and societal conditions. I struggled for years as my mental, physical, emotional and spiritual health significantly deteriorated. I had little knowledge and understanding of what I was experiencing and as a result became stuck in my own mind and body, not knowing who or where to go for help. It was a silent, chronic battle that made itself known through many symptoms including severe gut health issues, depression, anxiety, addictive habits, impulsive behaviours, unexplainable pains and aches, physical and mental fatigue, disordered eating, isolation and withdrawal. When I started this journey it felt like a domino effect, one thing fell apart after the other. My relationships began to change, my sense of self felt completely lost and I was unable to experience any positive feelings. It felt as if everything in my life was falling apart.
Practicing as a psychologist for several years I leaned into the strategies and tools I often provided to my clients. Whilst these tools helped keep my head above water, I couldn’t shake this feeling that something more was happening beneath the surface; something far beyond what I could comprehend. Over the span of a few years I began searching for answers and found myself exploring various forms of healing modalities - psychology, acupressure, acupuncture, dream analysis, kinesiology, naturopathy, therapeutic tarot reading, plant medicines, psychedelic-assisted therapy, and psychospiritual therapy. I began working with various professionals and researching multiple methods of healing. Not only did I seriously question if I had some addiction to therapy, but I realised that each modality led me to discover that mind, body, and sprit can’t function independently of one another but instead require a harmonious coherence. When we explore mental health challenges or psychological diagnoses, it becomes clear that our thoughts, feelings, and beliefs are deeply connected to our physical and physiological health. This connection works both ways our mental and emotional states influence our body, and our physical health can shape how we think, feel, and perceive the world. When there’s a disconnect or imbalance between our thoughts, emotions, and core beliefs, it can lead to difficulties not only mentally and emotionally but also physically and spiritually.
My relationship breakdown acted as a catalyst for years of suppressed material to surface. I discovered that beneath the surface were emotions, memories, and experiences from childhood trauma, sexual assault, complex family dynamics and the myriad of challenges that come with just being human that I had never processed but rather hid away deep within my internal world. My mind and body were full of unprocessed experiences.
Imagine a computer or your phone at its full capacity, we’ve all received that annoying reminder that appears on the screen stating ‘storage full, make space or delete items’… Despite the constant message that tries to warn us, we continue to minimise and ignore the sign. That is, until the inevitable shut down of the entire system. We too experience the signs of an imbalanced system; whether it be through physical symptoms, chronic conditions, change to our functional capacity, sense of disconnection, anxiety, depression and so forth. What I learned over time was my symptoms were communicating with me on a deeper level, but with the lack of understanding I too continued to minimise and ignore the signs. And just like a computer at full capacity, my system just s**t itself. I was forced to shut down and figure out how to reboot my entire system.
Call me resilient, or slightly stubborn, but part of me knew there was something out there that could provide the healing that I needed, and that others needed too. l became determined to unveil a deeper truth for myself, and for others, that healing were possible at a deeper level. I began to seek for meaning and understanding which sparked a curiosity deep within my heart. Through various therapeutic modalities I began to discover how layered and multi-faceted we are as human beings, and healing sometimes requires an integration of tools that nurtures mind, body and spirit.
I always knew I wanted to pursue a career where I could connect with people and be of service to others. I had an innate passion for understanding human nature and what drives our behaviour, and always held a keen curiosity to understand the deeper meaning of life. Psychology has been a passion of mine for as long as I could remember and it’s teachings have been invaluable. Psychology has taught me the fundamentals of our human nature. What lies beneath the surface of our behaviour. Journeying through these experiences, and continuing to explore, I endeavour to grow my understanding of the mind, body, and soul connection to bring a more holistic level of healing to those who are called to it. And so I invite those of you that feel called, to follow along the journey with me discovering and exploring what healing has to offer and supporting each and everyone person to find balance and meaning in their own lives. My journey has already taken me places as far as South America to deepen my knowledge and understanding of the possibilities of healing. As I journey to other parts of the globe, wherever my heart may take me, I hope to learn and document methods of healing carrying a curious mind, open heart and grounded spirit.
DISCLAIMER: I am honoured to share parts of my journey in the hopes that it may resonate or spark a curiosity that leads you on your own journey of healing, however it is important to remember that some elements shared are completely subjective and relate to my own personal experiences. I write this because we are all on our own path and what may be right for one, may not necessarily be right for the other. But this is the journey. Learning to listen to that inner voice that guides you exactly where you need to go. My goal is to support you to find your own path by listening to your inner voice and trusting what it needs. There are so many wonderful, grounded, and enlightening methods of healing and it is my aim to shed light on these so that you may integrate a form of healing that is right for you.
Love, WYSEbymonique